New Years means new beginnings and a chance to start over, or reinvent yourself. Do you feel stuck in a relationship that’s going nowhere? Have a job you hate waking up and going to every morning? Have your skinny jeans been lying in the back of your closet for so long, they have cob webs growing over them? Is this what you’ve always pictured your life would be? Chances are it’s not. That’s why every year we make resolutions and goals. It’s our way of holding on to that little bit of hope we still have left.
I’ve been there. About four years ago my life as I knew it fell apart. A failed engagement led me to move back to New York where I stayed up for many a night crying and wondering what the heck am I going to do now since everything that I had perfectly planned, had disappeared faster than Milli Vanilli’s career. I’m not going to tell you that my road to reinvention happened overnight, but I looked at it as two distinct choices; curl up into a ball and let this defeat me, or accept that sometimes failure is God’s protection and redirection. The Universe gave me a wake-up call, and I finally picked up the phone. How about you, are you ready to wake up yet? Here are three of my tips to help reinvent yourself in the New Year.
Shift away from the – – – –
Sometimes we need to break away from friendships we’ve outgrown. Not because we’re “better” than them (FYI – hate this expression), but because they’re dragging you down. There comes a time when for your own sanity and personal growth, you need to limit your contact with some toxic people. This also means silencing the noise from some of your well meaning family members. Too often it’s their fear that causes them to give you advise that’s not the greatest. Your family, and especially your parents, just want you to be comfortable and settled, even if it’s doing something you hate – – because it’s safe.
Learn the lesson
There’s not too many of us that don’t secretly cringe when we think about some of our more unfortunate moments. Like that time we may have hit up the open bar a bit too much at the office Christmas party, or let an opportunity slip through our fingers because we were afraid to speak up and say “pick me”. Or my favorite, staying in a relationship way past it’s expiration date. If we chalk up these mistakes to life lessons and actually learn from them, then we won’t make the same mistakes again. No one expects you to be perfect, so forgive yourself for any of your past indiscretions and choices, and move on.
Take a chance
Not like jaywalking during rush hour in Manhattan. More like take a chance and actually do what you’ve said you were going to do. So many of us are prisoners of our paychecks. We stay in jobs we hate because we already spent next week’s paycheck before it’s even deposited in our account. I’m not saying to just quit your job tomorrow, and say; “to hell with it!!”, I know that’s a luxury many of us can’t afford. But, if you’re unhappy and unfulfilled, then you need to start acting right now so that you won’t be in this same position a year from now. For some of us that means being more financially responsible. Or going back to school again at night. If you don’t like how you look or feel, then stop making up excuses why you can’t work out today. Continuing to eat like a cave woman is not going to get you in shape sweetheart. Everyone has to start somewhere. Being comfortable and complacent has killed many a dream. Take a chance. You may not know exactly where you’re going, but it’s time to put your foot on the pedal and press go.